The Importance of Trust: Building and Maintaining Strong Relationships

Shandel Sutherland • July 8, 2024

Welcome to Lead for Clarity, where we help you, your team, and your organization get to the next level by focusing on what matters most. My name is Shandel Sutherland, and today I want to share something that's been on my mind and the minds of my clients: Trust.

Trust is either growing or eroding; there's no in-between. In this blog post, we'll explore the dynamics of trust, how it grows, and how erosion can sneak up on us. More importantly, we'll discuss how to build and maintain trust in both personal and professional relationships.


The Growth of Trust


When trust isgrowing, it's because we are actively working on it. We're putting in the effort, taking vulnerable chances, and sharing both our weaknesses and strengths. Sometimes, revealing our strengths can be more challenging than exposing our weaknesses. Growing trust involves being humble, kind, and looking for these qualities in others as well.


The Erosion of Trust


Erosion of trust happens quietly and often goes unnoticed. It's like living by a river, enjoying the beautiful shoreline daily, only to realize years later that it's eroded. This analogy reflects many relationships; if we are not actively investing in them, trust can begin to erode. The erosion can be slight or significant, but either way, it impacts the strength of our connections.


Avoiding Erosion: Guarding Against Busyness


One of the biggest culprits of trust erosion is being too busy. Busyness can lead good-hearted people to neglect their relationships, causing trust to diminish. This is true in personal and professional settings. In organizations, trust can erode when promises aren't kept, deadlines are missed, ownership isn't taken, and vulnerability is lacking.


The Foundation of Trust in High-Functioning Teams


Patrick Lencioni's book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, emphasizes that trust is the foundation of a functional team. Even before establishing trust, effective communication is crucial. Miscommunications can erode trust. For example, when I ask my husband to get milk, I mean immediately, while he might interpret it as "next time you're at the store."

At Shandel Group, we always start with the Clarity Report to address communication styles, behavior, and motivations. Understanding these aspects helps us build a foundation of trust.


The CIA of Trust: Character, Integrity, Ability


To simplify the elements of trust, we use the acronym CIA:


  1. Character: Trusting someone's character means believing that they will do what they say and live with integrity.
  2. Integrity: This goes hand-in-hand with character. It's about following through on promises and consistently aligning words, thoughts, and actions.
  3. Ability: Can they perform their responsibilities? Do they have the necessary competencies and capacity?


We need to understand which elements are essential for building trust in various relationships. Some people might be trustworthy in one context (e.g., work) but not in another (e.g., babysitting your kids).


The Benefits of Trust


One major benefit of trust in teams is the ability to engage in healthy conflict. As leaders, we must encourage and contain feedback from our team. Trust enables team members to have tough conversations and know that their feedback will be handled constructively. This engagement in healthy debate and conflict helps bring diverse perspectives to the table, fostering innovation and better decision-making.


Encouraging Healthy Conflict


As a leader, it's your job to encourage healthy conflict on your team. This means creating an environment where members feel safe to express their thoughts and opinions without fear of retribution. The more your team engages in open and honest debate, the more trust will be built among them. Trust, once established, will enhance team cohesion and productivity.


The Cycle of Trust and Leadership


One crucial point to consider is that trust is a continuous cycle of growth and reinforcement. According to the principle "Follow the basics of leadership and you will never be a basic leader," always ensure you build a robust foundation based on trust. Leadership fundamentally boils down to your heart for people, your communication style, and your dedication to trust-building.


Trust in Personal Relationships


It's essential not to take any relationship for granted, particularly those with people you live with, such as spouses, partners, and children. These relationships need constant nurturing and care. Use the five love languages to communicate effectively and frequently to build and strengthen trust.


Conclusion


In every interaction and relationship, trust is either growing or eroding. To foster and maintain trust, be mindful of your actions, communicate clearly, and invest time and effort. Remember that the strongest relationships are those continually built on a foundation of mutual trust and respect.

Thank you for joining me in this quick edition of Lead for Clarity. Remember, building trust is an ongoing process. Make it a priority today and every day, because it's fundamental

Breaking the Cycle of Misery: A Leadership Journey

By Shandel Sutherland • November 24, 2024
Introduction Have you ever felt trapped in a cycle of stress, frustration, and burnout? As leaders, it's easy to get caught up in the day-to-day grind and lose sight of what truly matters. In this blog post, we'll explore the concept of the "cycle of misery" and how to break free from it. Understanding the Cycle of Misery The cycle of misery is a common trap that many leaders fall into. It's characterized by a negative mindset, a focus on problems, and a tendency to blame others. When we're in this cycle, we become our own worst enemies, constantly worrying and stressing over things that are outside of our control. Key Signs of the Cycle of Misery: Fear and Insecurity: Feeling overwhelmed and uncertain about the future. Anger and Frustration: Blaming others for problems and taking things personally. Lack of Confidence: Doubting your abilities and questioning your decisions. Isolation: Withdrawing from others and avoiding social interaction. Negativity: Focusing on the negative aspects of situations and people. Breaking Free from the Cycle To break free from the cycle of misery, we must focus on the following: Self-Awareness: Recognize the signs of the cycle and be honest with yourself about your current state. Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness techniques to stay present and reduce stress. Positive Self-Talk: Challenge negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations. Seek Support: Talk to a mentor, coach, or therapist to gain perspective and guidance. Prioritize Self-Care: Make time for activities that you enjoy and that help you relax. Focus on Solutions: Instead of dwelling on problems, focus on finding solutions. Connect with Others: Build strong relationships with colleagues, friends, and family. The Healthy Cycle of Growth In contrast to the cycle of misery, the healthy cycle of growth is characterized by positivity, resilience, and a focus on solutions. By cultivating a growth mindset and practicing self-care, we can break free from the cycle of misery and achieve our full potential. Conclusion Remember, it's okay to experience challenges and setbacks. The key is to recognize when we're slipping into the cycle of misery and take proactive steps to break free. By focusing on our values, practicing self-care, and connecting with others, we can create a more fulfilling and rewarding life.

Lead with Authenticity

By Jake Hinton • October 7, 2024
Embark on a transformative leadership journey where authenticity meets growth. This article delves into the pathways taken by a CEO to foster authentic leadership, emphasizing the shift from comfort zones to growth areas. Explore how resilience, accountability, and value alignment pave the way for effective leadership. By understanding oneself and embracing challenges, leaders can inspire their teams and nurture organizational success. Join us in uncovering the ripple effect of personal growth and its impact on building strong, authentic relationships.
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